Thursday, September 29, 2011

Blessings and Blunders.

Like that title? Remember when I needed something to replace my ever-so-unoriginal Awkward and Awesome's? Well... most of you kinda failed me. BUT! Someone who didn't and most likely never will was my momma. She was one of like... 2 who offered suggestions. "Blessings and Blunders" had a ring to it, so I'm gonna take it for a spin.
To sum up my day:

-I saved a baby off of a galloping stallion... or tripped going upstairs... or backhanded a cinder block (a few times). Choose whichever description sounds the best to you, and that's how we'll explain my unsightly hand.
- I realized I may be certifiably insane. Nobody likes epiphanies like that.
-Being actually blocked by the girl Ryan's been going on dates with recently. Listen, you requested me to be your friend, remember? I'll admit it was a first time for me. Everyone loves being treated like a crazy-stalker-harassment-axe-murderer. I'm thinking about being one for Halloween actually.
- Coming to the conclusion that I must be the crazy ex-fiance that they base horror films off of. Awesome. There's a self-esteem booster.
-SO. MUCH. HOMEWORK. Nuff said.
-Having to cut my nails really short for my ceramics class. Sorry boys, no more back scratches. It's a sad day.
- Getting burned in the tanning booth. lame. Would you like sun kissed, half Indian, or fried to a crisp?
... I'll go with fried to a crisp please.

- Only having one class. Tuesdays and Thursdays are nice to me.
- Having Ryan in that class. Even though we technically are not "together" anymore, he continues to always be the more of the man that I fell in love with everyday. He's my Angel (and was more so today than usual), and proves so way more often than I deserve.
- About a week ago I posted on Facebook that I was craving Puppy Chow and that whoever could bring me some would get a big fat kiss. To no surprise.... no one came. Weird right? Sounds like an offer I wouldn't be able to refuse. People have strange priorities... anyway. My momma sent me a nice big bag! Is that a hint of cinnamon my delicate palette tastes?... hmmm Thanks Momma! I needed those.

- Missing my home teachers because I was in class (actually a blunder), BUT, they came back and taught me one on one. THOSE are men, friends.
- Eating the whoooole container of yogurt for breakfast. I usually only eat half of one, but today I was feeling especially hungry (or fatty) and decided I was gonna down the whole cup! It was peach, who could resist? Good thing it was low fat :)
- Dollar stores. I like em. A lot.

And that's pretty much it. Tomorrow I go to Wyoming with my amazing friend Shelley! Special thanks to her hubby William for forfeiting her to me for the weekend :) So stoked for an escape!
Later Gators.

They say time heals everything... Those of faint heart, do not read.

I'll believe it when I see it. 
Time is not a medication. 
When we need it the most, there never seems to be enough. And when we want it to pass, it inches on for eternity. It's like the not-nearly-enough-portion of medical supplies during WWII, and you are the 17 year old soldier who lied about your age to serve your country, are suffering internal bleeding, 3 gunshot wounds, pain beyond anything you felt on the playground, and the medic just ran out of Morphine. So you lie there. You can pray the bombs fade in the background. Maybe you'll pass out from loss of blood. The wounds are pretty bad, but apparently not bad enough to kill you and mercifully give you the permanent slumber that at that point you'd give anything for. So still... you lie there. listening. You can hear everything around you, see all the others in pain, frantically going about their own fights for survival, but seeing past your own pain is near impossible. Envious of those who have not yet been shot. More envious of those who's injuries were severe enough to kill them on impact. And just when you think you've just about had enough, someone has the nerve to shoot you again, as if just in case, you may survive. Close your eyes, think of home. Think of Malt O' Meal on Easter morning. The look on your sister's face when she finally rode Space Mountain at Disneyland, and loved it despite her fear. Your first kiss. Your last. That time you and your best friend climbed on the roof and got stuck up there (don't tell mom). How your mom never finished reading you that novel. Footie pajamas. Find your happy place. 
                          Come on.
                                 Come on.
                                      For the love of Heaven, please!
It's kinda hard to find warmth when all the blood is draining from your body. Is it better to know when the end is near or to be hurt so bad that you don't realize it? I have to wonder...

Time cannot erase your memories, it may blur them, but they are still there, ready to be recalled, felt again, missed again, and since 75% of the pain I feel is due to remembering, I guess I'm out of luck.

                                       come on,
                                                  keep thinking...
The warmth of the Sand in Idaho, fourth of July parades at Grandma's, the smell of acrylic paint.

Do you ever feel like the one dud in the crowd at a comedy show who misses the punchline? Thanks to the tall guy in front of you, you cannot see the act, you can only hear it. The problem is, half the reason it's so funny is because of the performance the comedian is physically portraying. Maybe you're just too dumb to get the humor, because everyone seems to get the joke but you. You just paid $15 bucks to feel stupid and miss the show.
You all know what I mean, and don't you dare try to deny it. It kinda hurts. And no matter how much time passes, it's still gonna hurt like it did that first day.
Mom: You feel it every year on November 17th, and May 12th, and probably way more often than I know. 
Laura: you feel it every time you have a seizure (which is pretty often).
There's a girl on campus who's fiance died last week. She is going through Hell right now.
Some of you feel it whenever you step on a scale, or open your bill statements, or fail a test that you could not have been more confident about.
Those of you who've had a miscarriage can relate.
All those late night phone calls from the Police station when your teenager is still out on the town.
It's that sinking feeling when you realize books are replacing groceries.... but ten times worse.
It's when you are scared. Really, really scared.

Me? I feel it whenever I get on facebook, usually on Tuesdays and Thursday's during D&C. Just about every Friday and Saturday night, on Monte Christo Tuesdays, when I'm falling asleep at night. That's the worst. On the 27th of every month.

 "Time never had the chance to heal your heart." ... Will it?

Well said Jimmy. Well said.

I think the jokes on me.

Have you heard Jimmy Eat World's song "Dizzy"? It's a good one.
I couldn't find a good music video of it, so here's what you get.

"You close your eyes and kiss your hand then you blow it.
But it isn't meant for me, and I notice
If the choice was ours alone,
Then why'd we both choose letting go?
Does it end like this?

Time never had a chance to heal your heart
Just a number always counting down to a new start
If you always knew the truth
Then the world would spin around you
Are you dizzy yet?

Respectfully, so honestly I'm calling out
Do you hear the conversation we talk about?
Back away to the safety of a quiet house
If there's half a chance in this moment
When your eyes meet mine, we show it off.

All talk and not a lot to think, we were living dreams
And shame never crept close to our naked feet
If there's something left to lose,
Then don't let me wear out my shoes
I'm still walking.

I tried, but it rang and rang, I called all night
On a payphone, remember those from another life?
If everything I meant to you,
You can lick and seal then fold in two
Then I've been so blind.

Respectfully, so honestly I'm calling out
Do you hear the conversation we talk about?
Back away to the safety of a quiet house
If there's half a chance in this moment
When your eyes meet mine, we show it off.

Oh, oh take it all back, take the first, the last and only.
Oh, oh take it all back, take it all back,
Everything you showed me.
Oh, oh this must be how it feels when the feeling goes

I told you as I hovered, I never felt this way
You said I have the shot that stops my clock
Baby it's OK
You said you'd never have regrets
Jesus, is there someone yet
Who got their wish; did you get yours, babe?

Respectfully, so honestly I'm calling out
Do you hear the conversation we talk about?
Back away to the safety of a quiet house
If there's half a chance in this moment
When your eyes meet mine, we show it off."

or better yet, how about a little Brand New.
My blogs official title is "Taking a bite out of Life". Sometimes life has lemons. Feel free to offer up a killer recipe for lemonade, we can all use one every once and a while.

And for that, my apologies. I needed to just get a few things off my chest, it was getting hard to breathe.

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Welcome to Rexburg

Rexburg is a pretty versatile place I'd say. I had a little giggle while on the BYU-Idaho campus, and figured I'd share it with you all. Once my roommate Breanne and I were walking to the library, only to cross paths with this jolly fellow prancing around the sidewalk. 
I must say, out of everything that may have been going through his head, what I really want to know is what song was he dancing to, because it looked pretty dang awesome. Again, using my subtle creeper skills (probably illegal, yes.) I snapped a shot for us all. Enjoy!
Friend, you make it ok for us all to dance to the music in our heads that only we hear, and for that, we thank you! 
Next time I see him, I'm totally gonna get a picture with him :)

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

It's a sick, cruel world.

Why you ask? Here's why.
I'm in college. Poor. Trying to gain higher education so I won't always be poor. 
I want to contribute to society. Make the world a better place, ya know?
I live in an apartment.
I bought a parking pass for $20.
I get stuck with a parking pass for the parking lot next door because my parking lot is full.

"Ladies, buy parking passes, the tow truck comes often to make sure people don't steal your spots. Space is limited, we have a great location. We're doing this for you."
They started towing yesterday. At the crack of dawn. before the freaking birds were even awake. 

Hey, here's a poor college student who forgot to put her parking pass on this morning. SUCKER! 

Right.  Why would they think that maybe I lived here, I only have 5 previous parking passes for this apartment complex, why on earth would I buy another one?! 
Please, boot my car. Make me late for an interview. Make. My. Day.
People are sick I tell you. What jerks. 

So I call.

Poo head (aka tow man):"Do you have a parking pass?"
Me: "Yes, it's one my bumper."
Poo head: "Well it wasn't this morning, that'll be $50." 

So much for booting cars just to make sure we have our spots we paid for. Turns out they don't give a twinkie whether you belong there or not. 
Ya know what Mr. Cranky-I-probably-still-live-in-my-mom's-basement-pants, I'd really love to eat oatmeal for the next 3 weeks, please take my money. Would you also like the $20 I paid for my parking pass? (yea, that one you don't care about that is supposed to save me from creeps like you). Or better yet, have my firstborn child. Really, it's no biggy. 

Who grows up and wants to be the dud who puts boots on poor college students cars anyway? It's sick I tell you!!!!

Ya know what the worst part is? They have the system rigged. While I waited, boiling mad, I thought many of choice words to lay on said Poo-head cranky man, only to find that instead of the meanie I expected:
(this being similar to who I imagined)

I found myself face to face with a nice college student similar to this:
OK..... You caught me. He didn't look exactly like this... This may or may not be the guy playing "Gale" in the next box office hit The Hunger Games. Trust me, if this was the guy that got out of that slimy car, I woulda given him a lot more than $50 bucks... like my hand in marriage ;)

Still... They send a nice college guy to do their dirty work, so you don't even feel right about getting mad at him! Stupid.

 And that's that. Watch out people, their driving through your lots, and locking your cars up. Hide yo keys, hide yo wife ....cuz their charging errbody out there.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Awkward/Awesome Disneyland wrap up.

Here's the long time needed Disneyland update! Because I'm too lazy, and busy to go into detail of it all, we're pulling the equally fun "awkward and awesome" summary. Enjoy.
Awesome: Pizza for dinner in a hotel room. That's gonna be my dream honeymoon baby... or would have been. Except I was with my parents. (awkward)
Awesome (and kinda awkward): Being on a different flight from my family. I had the independence, along with the imaginary game pretending I was an orphan child running away from the child services. You should try it sometime. It's riveting.
Awkward: Having security search through my baggage, finding a homemade loaf of bread, me making the joke "Careful, She's still hot out of the oven and ready to blow!" ha. ha. ha. uhhh not funny? oknevermindsorry. Come on security people lighten up.
Awesome: People at the airport. I love people watching. (for more info read here)

Awkward: Searching for my wallet in my backpack for 20 minutes, and having the cashier at over-priced airport store watch closely to make sure I'm not stealing. "Sorry, I can't find my wallet, but I really want this chex mix! Can I give you one of my arms or legs instead? That's what you charge isn't it?...."
Awesome: California Temples. Especially the San Diego. I don't care where my future man is from, we're getting married there.

Awesome: Disneyland. It really is the happiest place on earth people.
Awkward: An employee at Disneyland chewing out my little brother for taking a water bottle on a ride. Hey lady, you work at the happiest place on earth! Smile and leave this child alone! cough-bully-cough.

Awkward: How looong some of the lines were at D-land, and how strange some of the people in them were. Personal Favorite, the matching gay couple wearing a Repeal Prop 8, legalize Gay marriage shirt. Ok, you've made your point clear, now let me enjoy time with my straight, gender balanced parents.
Awesome: The fireworks at Disneyland! They started while me and the siblings were on the Teacup ride... oh the music, we danced and skipped, I felt like peter pan. Pictures will never do this magic justice.
 Also Awesome: The teacup ride. Nuff said.

Awesome: The rides. Space mountain, Indiana Jones, I sure loved the Finding Nemo one! Lemme tell you, advancing technology is starting at Disneyland. They are holding out on us.
Awkward: Seeing two mexican guys with shirts that said "Free Chorizo's" and an arrow pointing down. Ryan speaks Spanish. "Hey Ryan, what does "Chorizo" mean?" Ryan:"ohhh they are these amaaazing sausages." ... ... sickos. Cue barfing now.
Awkward: Every picture of me taken on any ride. wow. I'm a looker. That last picture was in the Hollywood tower hotel. Freaking scary ride people. I hate rides that drop without warning.

Awesome: I saw Sully! none of my family did. But I know he was there.
Double Awesome: The Bug's Life part of California adventures. Would that not be the funnest part of the park to brainstorm?! Oh ok I got it... What about we make benches that look like giant popsickle sticks? yea yea! oh oh, and when people enter, they can walk through a tunnel, but it's not really a tunnel, it's a cereal box! Oh that's good, somebody give Earl a raise!
Awkward: Matching T-shirt with the fam. We used to do it when we were younger, I thought it was gonna be awesome! Oh yea... I'm 20 years old. Matching your mom isn't really that cool anymore. whoops.
 Awkward: Taking an ice cube from a fruit kiosk at Disneyland, and getting the stink eye from an employee. Excuse me sir, do you know who I am? I'm a good girl, not some criminal! Sorry I took a peice of your ice, last time I checked it was 85 degrees outside, and everyone at Disneyland was being COOKED TO DEATH! Here's $5 for the ice cube, I know you charge a little more than that, but that's all you're getting for the dirty look!
Awesome: Having a girl walk next to me, ask where we were from and... oh yea, if we were LDS. Was it the Matching shirts that tipped you off? Partially but no, it was the dashing good looks and modest shorts. haha Good thing I didn't wear my boo-tay shorts. It was tempting.
Awesome: Piggy back rides. and lots of them! I had no idea how sore my feet would get!

Really, Really Awesome: The World of Colors water show. Indescribable, and totally amazing. It. was. so. cool. I don't care if you pay $80 to get in the park to just see that. Do it.
Awesome: PINEAPPLE WHIP! My roommate Breanne always raved about it, and rightly so! The most amazing pineapple yumminess ever. When I'm preggo, My hubby had better be ready to drive to D-land and get me Pineapple whip. The true test of love.
Awesome... or not depending on how you look at it: Looking like Mega mind thanks to the lighting in a picture my mom took. Do you see it?

No? Ok... how about now?!

Ok good. I was beginning to worry about you.

Awesome: I saw Ryan, and the Ocean (for the first time) and we had sushi! It was great! However, I'm not sure I can ever look at seaweed the same. Seeing it floating in miso soup kinda creeps me out now. bummer.

Cutie Patootie.
Awesome: We matched. You can't really tell, but there's a mustard yellow and teal pattern on his shirt. yea, we're still in sync. haha
Awkward: Being on the beach, seeing an Asian guy take pictures of his woman, watch them shamelessly, only to have him turn, catch us watching him, and have him start taking pictures of us! ok buddy, we'll leave you alone, I get the picture. (haha get it? get the picture? pa da chaaaa)
SOOO not Awesome: Security throwing away my $20 bottle of Tanning lotion. It made it to California, just not back. Boo you CA airport.

And that's pretty much it. Also, I have a request to all 22 of my clever followers. This whole "Awesome and Awkward" idea is most definitely not my own, but I just love it, it has a ring to it, the alliteration, and the perfect descriptive words to describe everyday situations (they are all either awesome.. or awkward aren't they?) Anyways, I'm starting to feel kinda like a copy cat, and nobody like a copycat, and I'm stumped. Do you have any ideas for what words I can use instead of awesome and awkward?! Weeee neeeeed yooouuuuurrr heeeeelllllp :} (galaxy quest quote anyone?)

So yes, please please please give me some of your brilliant ideas so I can copy you instead!

Monday, September 12, 2011


You. You reading this blog. Our first order of business: I keep hearing people like my blog. HOW SWEET! I'm so flattered people actually read this, and no less like it! Thanks friends! I really appreciate it, and now that I know people other than my mom read this, I'm going to make an effort to blog a little more often. I'm gonna take my blog-while-in-school average from once a semester to a whopping once a month! (hold the applause) Now, I have a little favor. Call me a little silly, but I feel special when I see I have more followers (it warms my soul). Anyhow, I KNOW MORE PEOPLE READ THIS THAN ARE OWNING UP TO IT!!! So I'll crack you a deal. For every new follower I get (official follower people)
I will go out, 
buy that follower an ice cream cone, 
and eat it for them :) 
It would melt otherwise, I'm just thinking of you here, you can thank me later. Anyways for those of you reading this, who are not "following" my blog, but are reading it right now (you know who you are!) click that little follow button at the top of the screen. We can be friends. Even if I don't know you. Or don't like you (yes, that means you Bieber) Do it anyways. It show's guts. haha So right now I have 20 followers. Let's see if that changes. Thanks kids :)

Moving on, I made some earrings. And for $2,000 I can make you some too! (jk... I'll make you some for a nice bag of Mrs. Rhodes Cinnamon rolls, cash also accepted :) anyways, if and when I EVER start an Etsy account, these babies will be the stars. AND they are real freshwater pearls. Are you impressed yet? Ok just checking.
And here is my loverly little sista modeling my lovelies :)
Oooooh yeeeeaaaa.
Alright that's all. I started school today and so I've got things to do. You know the drill. 
Later Gators!

Friday, September 9, 2011

People are Special.

Really, they are. And, I don't mean that in the usual sarcastic they're all idiots sort of way. They really are something. I find that if you ever need a reality check that you are not the only one in the world, and what's normal to you may not be what's normal to others, you just need a private date with an airport. Airports really snap me into the reality that people are far more complex and versatile than what small glimpse I am used to in Spokane or Rexburg. When you fly over the vast lands of the world, seeing it from a different angle than you are used to, it's surprising to see how incredible people really are, by what they've created. Airplanes for example: next time you are one one, think about how intense the mechanics are behind that thing. People can fly. WE CAN FLY!!!! That's kinda awesome. Also, have you ever noticed how perfectly organized our land is? Detailed with circles and squares. It's art really. I show you.

During my hour and a half delay in the Portland airport I find myself sitting across from people of all sorts of walks of life. For privacy purposes I've changed all to-be mentioned peoples names (and primarily because I do not know them.) There's "Mr. Ling Ling" and his wife, with his camera probably permanently attached to his neck. I imagine him with a thick Asian accent, and because all Asians look the same to me, I couldn't begin to tell you what nationality is his. Despite this bystander judgment, I'll bet he's from Brooklyn. I hope I don't hear him speak, I much enjoy my imagined background for him. Then there's Mr. and Mrs. Brown. They sit next to eachother, reading their separate books, eating their separate snacks, and appear to have attempted to keep their lives as separate as possible throughout the last 30 years of marriage. They both look tired, bored, possibly of each other. Throughout the entire time I watched them from sitting down, to boarding the plane, they did not utter a single word to one another. They appeared to be attached by some invisible force (usually called marriage) but miraculously were able to ignore the other existed the entire time. Surreal really. There was "Hazel", she was a personal favorite. Kind eyes, sipping her Starbucks coffee, sitting by the window where the sunlight accentuates every wrinkle on her content face. Every line with a different story that made her who she is today, whether it's happiness or sadness that created those wrinkles, we may never know, the point is they are proof that whatever put them there, she survived. And this brings us to "Abala-kuzanistan-hamid-aladdin". Every airport has one... most people just know him as the guy in the turban who may or may not be concealing a bomb, and who they pray isn't on the same flight as them. I decided he had no explosives on him, but rather was an accountant from Boise. Additionally we had all walks of life, every color of hair from purple to gray, every style of clothing, and every nationality you could think of. Yep. An airport is all it takes to really make you realize the world is a lot bigger than you thought. So does Disneyland... but that's a different story.

AND For your viewing pleasure: Mr. Ling Ling. Yes I'm a creep. Illegal? Probably. But who can resist that fanny pack?!