Because everyone who knows me knows I love nothing more to slap words on a photo and use it as decor, I have for you all a Christmas Printable. Truth is, I cannot figure out how to add this as a PDF for the life of me... So we're going old school drag and drop style. Good luck! haha
I was lying in bed, warm and snuggly under the covers, listening to the rain pattering on the window, seeing the sun stream through the blinds and thought ... yea.... I could do this. This is good.... Then I got out of bed and being the swanky adult I am, saw it was 11 o'clock and caught a glimpse of this head of crack addict hair as shown below.
Mugshot oooor mugshot? I submit that this is mugshot material plucked right off the streets of the projects.
It's days like these that I'm just overflowing with gratitude that my husband still loves me. haha
Thankfully, when I wake up like this, I remember people like this and am reminded it could always be worse.
Because who isn't mourning the loss of a vacation week right?
When the alarm on Ryan's phone went off this morning, I have never wanted more than to be a four year old at that moment. To hang around all day, be fed my sammiches in little triangles and to watch Rugrats all day.
It chimed it's cruel it's-Monday-back-to-the-grind tune, and all I wanted was pie.
Ok, not literally pie (but really), rather everything pie represented to me this past week.
Pie for breakfast, pie for lunch, pie for dinner. Pie meant no term papers, no answering e-mails at the office, no being forced to put on make-up and walk out into the cold world.
It meant the smell of my home. My own home; the one I grew up in, and my own bed. The smell of oil paint and floral incense that lingers in the walls of my bedroom. It meant no dishes screaming at me to be done; no feeling of money being sucked from my wallet every time we turn on the heat in a meager attempt to make our apartment a house rather than a necessity. Depression and pie do not co-exist. Pie meant the fridge was full. I could eat cheese, and as much as I wanted, because I wasn't paying for it. I could sleep in and not feel rushed by any responsibilities scratching on the window to be done.
I could write, and do my nails, and take naps.
I love naps.
I got home cooked meals without the pressure of preparing them; wondering if they are even edible or worthy of serving at all. And somehow, the dishes got done after I ate. I didn't have to touch a single sponge. The house was bright, a candle was always lit, and the decorations found their way on the walls.
There was a Christmas tree, not a blaring space in the living room that represented $100 in your pocket or a tree to fill the gap, but an actual tree dotted with the ornaments of my childhood.
Yep. I really miss pie. Needless to say, motivation for school these next few weeks are slim to none.
I need a big motivation pill to swallow with a tall glass of sparkling gratitude. That is all.
My friend Shelley went and adopted the puppy! Ya know, that angel we fell in love with at the pound (pre-stalking experience). He is perhaps the sweetest, most gentle dog I've ever seen in my life. I have yet to hear a peep out of him. It's a shame really, because I know if I ever get a dog, he will seem like Satan next to what I am now accustomed to. Here's some glamour shots of this sweet little guy!
gaaaaaah! IS YOUR HEART NOT MELTED?!?!
Here's the proud momma with her boy. Proof that owners get dogs that match them perfectly!
I'm sexy and I know it...
Such a tired little guy. It's hard to be loved on so much.
I think I need a puppy. Yup, It's official.
Speaking of puppies, I've been able to spend my Thanksgiving break drawing, (greatest vacation ever)!
My subject matter you ask? It is none other than our ever-so-handsome bachelor Ernie, the puppy extraordinaire over at Chronicles of Ruthie Hart!
Did you really think I would give away the surprise so easily?!
But seriously, probably one of my favorite portraits I've ever done, and my first animal drawing!
I'd say I've got a bad case of puppy fever as of NOW! Who's with me?!
So one of my dearest friends had a birthday this last week, which naturally warrants some girl time, lunch out on the town, visiting the pound to gawk over the sweet doggies, and being stalked in Walmart.
... Wait.... BEING STALKED IN WALMART?!
Yes, you heard right. Legitimately stalked.
There I am in the shampoo aisle looking at hairsprays when Ellie comes over and whispers "Val... I really think we are being followed." I totally thought she was being a lil cray-cray considering we live in basically the safest town in America. (Seriously, last weeks police report noted the bandit who left the store with two gallons of milk without paying, and the smoke detector set off at an apartment complex from burnt bacon...)
Ellie proceeded to tell me that she'd noticed the same older guy pass our aisle from both ends mutiple times and looking at us as if he were circling. I was like oookay Shells, until I saw it too! I went to the end of the aisle, turned the corner, and this peeping Tom was staring around the corner a few aisles down, slowly pulled back when I saw him.
I totally felt just like this kept happening:
But really... Creepiest thing ever?!
We thought maybe we were just being paranoid, so we went to the other end of the store to the Christmas decorations and low and behold, he followed us and was peeking over some girls clothes racks across the way. By that point it was getting really weird. We kept moving back through the store and like a magnet, he moved with us now lurking in the baby supplies. BABY SUPPLIES?! How about you just put a sign across your face that says "I'm a child molester!?"
He held a phone to his ear the whole time but wasn't talking on it and looked maybe 35-40 years old. We were so freaked out. We wandered the store for a while until we lost him and thought it was safe to go buy our stuff and go out to the car, but before we did, we decided to see if he was still lurking around just to make sure we knew where he was. Lo and behold, Creeper McCreeperson was back circling the shampoo aisle where we originally spotted him. We began towards the register trying to maneuver as far from him as possible and not 3 seconds after we saw him straight ahead in the shampoo section and turned left to walk away from him, did we cross paths with him coming from the left side, towards us! THE MAN APPARATED THERE! I have NO clue how he moved so blasted fast! Concerned for our dog-gone lives, we called Ellie's husband and his brother to come get us. When they got there, we got the male confirmation that something was seriously up with that dude.
We can now check "Stalked at Walmart" off our bucket lists.
[x] Almost kidnapped (age 17)
[x] Goosed at a concert (age 18)
[x] Stalked in a Walmart (age 21)
We met the sweetest puppy at the pound and attracted a legitimate creeper, I'd say we had a fairly productive day.
There is no secret within my family that I am the most emotional person know to man kind. If milk is spilled, I will cry for hours over it (and have...). Secret's out. I'll be the first to testify that my Husband is Superman for putting up with all he does.
My friend Laura posted this funny little thing on Facebook today:
It was sort of the most brilliant thing I have seen all day. So, I decided to make one of my own:
I'm thinking this may find its lil tush on our fridge. I hope my hubby finds it as funny as I do :)
Check out my prize plus many more at the giveaway over at The Chronicles of Ruthie Hart, and enter like it's going out of style!
What have I offered up to the blogger goddesses you ask?
BAM!
I'm offering a hand drawn original portrait (a $50+ value) (wait... this girl draws? Why yes, yes I do... or try to at least!). Plus there are so many awesome ladies offering up some goodies as well!
Then there are certain days where, hypothetically, I may be sitting in a postmodern literature class discussing the literary techniques found in the pages of Cormac McCarthy's post apocalyptic, dystopian novel "The Road", when I begin to get a little depressed by the subject matter and the cannibalistic state of living therein (weird right?). This is when my mind may be subject to wander to a little Utopia of my own... I invented it in seventh grade and am proud to offer you a round trip pass to a little place I like to call Valerieville :) I swear, I wasn't one of those kids whose only friends were imaginary... I think. haha
In fact, here I am at the awkward prime age of 14 when I came up with this imaginary utopia.
If I could go back in time, I'd introduce myself to a pair of tweezers and a treadmill...
Anywho,
Valerieville goes a little something like this:
(You have to read ALL of this in a british accent... because that is how I narrate things in my noggin :)
In Valerieville, I own a bakery where I get to decorate cakes all day. I'll eat whatever I want and never gain a pound because I have been "blessed" with good genes.
I also have adorable perfect babies that never cry or poop, whom I blog about from time to time. In these blogs I take flawless pictures with my expensive camera, fine tuned with my grade-A photoshop skills.
I also take pictures of the disgustingly fashionable outfits I wear and have a wardrobe so large and up-to-date that I never wear the same outfit twice.
I wear high heels when I go grocery shopping and others think that I am so suave.
I am funny (to people other than me and my mom. haha)
Money literally grows on trees.
I own a Sephora store and get everything I want for free (la duh!)
I am given an unlimited allowance from the hubby solely (pun totally intended) for shopping for shoes online.
And the laundry folds itself.
Did I forget I'm a wizard. Yea... I'm a wizard.
The snow is warm, everyone drives with the top down, and Diet Cherry Dr. Pepper is our water. It's sort of the greatest place ever.
Just as I was getting really deep into my day dreams, class ended and I was snapped back into reality. Now I'm blogging, wearing the same sweats I've had since I was 14 and exposing how much of a nerd I truly am.
My mom probably should have enrolled me in more sports when I was younger :) haha
So, lately I've become a bit more obsessed with aware about coupons. Thanks to a coupon for a free collage print from Walgreens sent straight to my inbox, this is the newest addition to our living room.
It's framed, next to our $20 used leather couch and on top of our cardboard box end table, and makes me feel nice inside every time I see it :)
And. I. LOVE. it.
Though I typically do not support crime (ya know... because I totally didn't steal this photo off Pinterest and just ad words to it or anything...), I recommend stealing it from my page and drooling over it in your own living room. I'm just not sure your keyboard is that water-proof ;)
Funny thing about this post: I wrote it basically a million years ago. I went in to change the lable and suddenly its coming up new, so here it is again for all the newcomers!
It's confession time. I understand the title of my blog is awfully misleading in the sense that it would be a great title for a cooking blog! ... Which this primarily is not. I apologize for this miscommunication, misleading word choice and dare I say, Betrayal! haha The truth is, I don't mind cooking, but I just don't do it often. I am STOKED to be able to cook for two, and until that day my cooking endeavors are far and few between. However, recently the planets aligned, hell froze over, and I, Valerie Braun Stratford, made something FROM SCRATCH!
Albertsons had a meat sale with pre-seasoned and prepared meals (holla holla awesome!), so naturally I couldn't pass it up, after all, I have a man to keep happy!
I bought a super delicious fajita mix and wanted to surprise my man with my fake ultra-home maker skills!
BUT THEN, I found I had no tortillas! In sweet desperation, (and feeling pretty proud of myself for even remembering you could combine that stuff called ingredients to make food...), I tapped into June Cleaver mode, whipped my apron out and went to town.
Home-made tortillas: prepare to meet your maker!
Ingredients
3 cupsOrganic, Unbleached Flour
1 teaspoonSalt
½ teaspoonsBaking Powder
⅓ cupsCanola Oil
1 cupHot Water
Preparation Instructions
Mix the flour, salt, and baking
powder with a whisk. Add the canola oil and mix with your fingers until
all the oil is incorporated and the mixture looks like fine crumbs. Add 1
cup of hot water and mix until a ball is formed. (I have also
refrigerated it overnight). Divide the dough into 12 balls, cover with plastic
wrap and let the dough rest for about 30 minutes. Roll out one at a time on a
floured surface. Brush off excess flour. Cook on a hot, ungreased
griddle over medium-high heat. Turn the tortilla when brown blisters
form on the first side. Stack the totillas and serve warm.
I will admit, they didn't knock my socks off but they were just tortillas, what can you expect? I did think they were pretty tasty! I recommend making them THIN. In my personal preference, the thinner the better, and I like them a little undercooked, otherwise they end up more bread like, and if I wanted manna, I would have been born in Moses's time!
So there you are you home-maker, tortilla-less, go-getters!
Entertaining isn't it? Keep watching... I will stir for-ev-er. haha
You know what I think? Some nights just warrant warm moist banana bread, a wine glass of cherry diet Dr Pepper, grandpa-esque pajamas and a cool fall breeze.
Here's the recipe I used, and it was SO good. Probably my favorite banana bread um-ever.
Ingredients
1/2 cup vegetable oil
1 cup granulated sugar
2 eggs
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 tsp almond extract
2 1/2 cups self rising flour (use all purpose and increase baking soda to 1 tsp)
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
3 medium overripe bananas, mashed (about 1 cup)
1 cup vanilla Silk almond milk, or better, light coconut milk
1 cup sweetened flaked coconut (or shredded coconut)
Directions
Preheat the oven to 350°F. Lightly grease a 9 by 5-inch loaf pan and set aside.
*I used 4 mini loaf pans, as you can see.
In the bowl using a wooden spoon mix the oil and sugar. Add the eggs, one at a time, beating after each addition. Stir in the vanilla and almond extract.
Whisk together the flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt in a mixing bowl. In a separate bowl, stir together the mashed banana and the coconut milk.
Gradually mix in the dry ingredients alternately with the wet ingredients. Start and end with the dry mixture. Mix until just combined. Stir in the flaked coconut.
Pour the batter to the prepared baking pan.
Bake for 1 hour – 1 hour and 15 minutes, when a toothpick inserted in the center of the loaf comes out clean.
*Adjust time if you use mini loaf pans. Mine took about 45 minutes.
If you wanna sit back, relax, and welcome November with warm banana bread, follow the prescribed routine above mentioned. You can thank me later.
Warning: This is my girly I-wish-I-had-all-the-monies-in-the-world post. Christmas is less than two months away! Don't tell me you aren't thinking about little pretties in your stockings as well.
I've had to keep a close eye on my debit card as it seems whenever I am bored I go through the same routine that goes something like this: Go to Amazon.com, look at acrylic nail kits, put way more than I should in my shopping cart, order, and then cancel my order because mature you-don't-neeeeed-this Valerie takes over. But I really just won't learn, or stop until I get it, lets be honest. I often just manicure my own nails because I'm a cheap-o and at the risk of sounding conceited, have pretty spectacular nail beds. haha, They don't turn out to shabby as seen in the photo here: (This was when I was newly engaged..)
But who wouldn't want to do acrylic nails from home?! I knew I wasn't alone.
It's confession time: I'm a little embarrassed to expose this outlandish thought, but about 2 years ago I remember being at a thrift store looking at jewelry and seeing some gaudy-as-I'll-get-out gold necklaces. I thought to myself, "Gold will NEVER come back into style." (GASP!) I was so wrong.
SO WRONG.
I have a little crush on simple gold styles nowadays. With that being said, I wouldn't be devastated if subconsciously in my sleep I were to unknowingly order any of these babies. (I've heard of people eating in their sleep... ordering fabulous jewelry in your sleep could happen, right?!)
Surely I'm not the only one with this issue. A girl can dream right?!
BYU-Idaho,
I have to admit, I almost forgot it was halloween until I walked out of a class and saw the Statue of Liberty, a Ninja Turtle, and a giant flamingo pass me on the way to work. At first I was all "Okay weirdies..." and then I realized "oh wait... it is Halloween." The funny thing is, even if it was not a holiday, I wouldn't put it past you. Sorry for my quick judgement.
Halloween is sort of a weird thing here is Rexburg. Though the towns population really is 50% or more college students, it is typically mild and scattered with goofy costumes and very little shenanigans. With this being the case though, I doubt we will get many trick-or-treaters this year. With my neighborhood being almost all young married college students, I'm was pretty sure the only trick-or-treaters to make their way to our humble caul-de-sac would be the occasional 2 year old dressed as the pillsbury dough boy beneath all of his coats and sweaters.
This was our halloween as a married couple! Supa presh right?! Really, the point I'm getting at is that this is the first year I coordinated costumes with someone! The anticipation is killing you I know, with all of the possibilities, what genius costume did me and the hubs come up with?!
Drum roll pleeeeaaaase!
Road kill. Hecka yes. We're classy as they come.
Saturday we went to a lil Halloween party with some friends, carved pumpkins and ate to our tummies delight. I made 7-layer bean dip and with a little bit of food coloring created a little grave yard, I know, I've just really out done myself this time! haha
But Let's be honest, yummy, easy, and seasonal. Can't beat that. All it was is refried beans, salsa, chopped lettuce, corn, sour cream and cheese. Mine was not even seven layers! Wham, bam, uncle Sam, you've got dip.
Ryan and I planned on going out with friends tonight to celebrate the festivities but earlier in the day I could feel a head cold coming on... We went home and took a nap and woke up at, oh, 8 o'clock. That was the second I realized we were probably one of those lame couples that don't do anything and flake on our friends to be boring. Whoops. haha I do say though, this takes the cake for most relaxing Halloween ever and I am not one bit upset that I'll have to eat this trick or treating candy for dinner. Nope, not one bit.
With all that being said happy Dia de Muerto you ghosts and ghouls!
I once had a friend tell me that she believed me to be the unluckiest person alive. Realistically I knew this not to be true, but sometimes I wonder...
Yesterday was a day that I think qualified as both a hazard to my health and my sanity.
I woke up to this:
I tip toed into class late thanks to the mass of Rexburg students who don't know how to drive in the snow, and received the loving look from my professor obviously saying "you've been late the last 3 classes, let me know how an F tastes" as I shot him this glance:
(Don't worry, unlike this portrayal, I was in fact clothed)
I went about my day until my work meeting that I had to conduct at 2. The powerpoint I prepared, the training, and everything I perfectly organized was on a computer that was slower than dirt. Nothing worked. Nothing. And on top of that our boss just so happened to pop in to our training and see how things were going just in time to catch my really,-I-did-prepare-something...I-swear lesson.
Shortly after, I raced to my car so I could drive to my class at the middle school and as I was stepping off the curb, I so gracefully slipped and slid into the ocean of slush surrounding my car: Skirt in the air, flat on my back, while the campus passed by in transition between classes. It was pretty epic.
So I lay there, a little stunned until my husband and a nice girl in passing come to help me up.
Needless to say, my bum bum was pretty wet. On the way to my class my husband and I laugh about how lucky it was that I landed on my backpack, yadda yadda and so on.
I get home from class, in a relatively good mood given all that had happened throughout the day and thinking it really couldn't get worse only to be greeted by this mess of laundry:
And....
Wait for it.....
The real kicker.....
This warped fork from the dishwasher:
(Anyone who thinks this fork is not a tragedy has obviously never loved a fork as much as I...)
As I go to open my laptop to play some music, I find that gravity managed to bring all the force of my body through the backpack, through the laptop case, and cracked my laptop screen when I fell earlier.
Laptop. Screen. Cracked.
Bloggers of the world, I give you permission to weep over this catastrophe.
Needless to say, bedtime was at 7:30 last night. Bed is the only safe place these days.
We went to Utah a few weekends ago and stayed with my health-conscious aunt,
who informed me of all sorts of healthy tricks, the first of which is
that almonds are a fat absorbing food.
Well... isn't this convenient
since I LOVE almonds! She bought fresh ground almond butter and I was
hooked from the start.
I remembered that the Vitamix we so
generously received for our wedding just so happened to have the
capabilities of grinding nut butter, so the wheels in my noggin began
turning.
Feeling ever so empowered, I gave it a try.
And it was DANG good.
Very healthy tasting, but I like that!
Not only that, this stuff was thicker than molasses in Alaska. You could literally cut it with a knife. I recommend eating it warm! SO good.
On a side note, may I just toot my own horn and say how in love with that little petal bowl I am!? You can see more of these ceramic creations for sale here!
I've had a few people asking for the recipe... are you ready for this?
Almond butter:
-Almonds.
Yep, that's it. I will admit I did add a little Veggie oil because mine was so dang thick. I know, i am ashamed. But all the same, it was yummy.
Wait, you made this in a blender? I don't believe it.
I know, me neither. I like to pretend I'm this wicked-legit home maker when really I'm not. It may be something you just have to see to believe:
Oh, and another little tidbit of information for all you extreme coupon-er wannabees like me, if you e-mail Blue Diamond Almond company and compliment them on their products with a request for coupons, they will mail you 6 coupons for Almond milk, almond products and so on. I know, It's like Christmas! You can thank me later :)
I was brought up with a strong sense of modesty in the way I dress, act and speak. I remember one time in third grade I wore a tank top under my sweater and took the sweater off when I got to school. I was kind of a rebel back in the day.
As much as I love the standards I was taught, I'll admit that their are certain styles I cannot embrace, and that from time to time clothes shopping can be a bit of a challenge (Pregnant women of the world, scoff at the amateur haha).
Because of this, I'd like to think I've become fairly crafty with my clothes because 1. They usually have to be tweaked to cover the goods, and 2. I'm cheap-o and rarely buy new clothes.
Now, you may notice that I don't (or won't in the future) wear clothes that do not quite reach my knee, or cover my shoulders, hide my rock hard abs, and hide my lady assets. This is not only because of the way I was raised, but also because since I was married I have begun wearing religious garments under my clothes. Yea, those white things ABC so rudely showed on television in their Truth about Mormons broadcast They are sacred and typically we keep them covered.
With that being said, when I run across thecutestdressever, or that shirtiwanttokissasmuchaswear kind of articles of clothing, I can find myself pretty distressed if they don't cover the necessities.
Alas, I have a solution for that just-a-liiiittle-too-short dress!
Please, hold the applause. But not really. haha
So I was shopping and ran across this adorable dress on sale for... wait for it.... $5! Naturally, I had to have it. Juuuust one problem. Actually two: No sleeves, and too short.
The no sleeves thing is easy. Throw on a cardi, or wear a shirt under and you're good to go.
Here is the picture before, showing off a little too much leg for my taste...
In order to combat this issue, I tried a few lil tricks:
1. I folding the dress straps down to make is a skirt and then held it up with a belt -->
But when that didn't satisfy me...
2. I whipped out the scissors, and old wife beater I never wear and lengthened the dress by cutting off the straps of the wife beater and sewing it onto the original straps.
As I'm sure you can imagine, it created the scoop neck of all scoop
necks and CANNOT be worn without an undershirt, but seeing as I wear one
all the time anyways, that was no problem for me.
If all those don't work, you can always:
3. Add a little extra fabric to the bottom.
The best part is you really don't need any background in sewing to pull any of these off.
IT. IS. BASIC.
I'm sure there's more but there you have it. Now go! And shop fearlessly!
I really enjoy ceramics, and one semester went little cerami-crazy. They began as little lumps of clay, and not without tears, sweat and quite a mess, I delicately nurtured and shaped them until they became mature finished products that I swore I'd never part with...
...Until I paid my rent.
It's time to part with some of my babies.
So ladies, who's up for adoption?! Because we have new additions to the shop and still more to come!
There's two things you just don't really bring up with people who may believe differently than you about certain topics and is a pretty big taboo in the blog world; religion and politics.
With that being said, I'm about to live on the edge a little and do it.
I just have a few thoughts about The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints AKA Mormons.
Mormons have been in the news a lot lately haven't they? What with the CNN documentary meant to delve into the secrets of the Mormon church and with one candidate for presidency being of that faith (like that really matters or something...) I'd say the Mormon church is getting a wee bit of media attention.
The musical "The Book of Mormon" sadly has become a broadway hit, making a mockery and crude comedy of the beliefs that we hold so dear, not to mention the limitless anti-mormon literature and articles all over the web. CNN chose to show the religious garments that are wear under our clothes, which though they are not some weird secret, are very sacred and showing them was a little disrespectful. (Not to mention they chose the most unflattering grandma style of them to show! haha like really? No wonder people think we're weird.)
It's silly really to feel so hated sometimes simply for what you believe. Anyone who has been discriminated against for anything they believed in whether it be religion, race, political standing or sexual orientation knows what I'm talking about. Why is it that the islamic faith get a formal apology for any offenses from the president of the United States yet Hilary Clinton herself is reported to be laughing and having a great time in the audience of a musical mocking LDS missionaries. I don't know. It's just weird to me.
So... do you wanna know the truth?
From a Mormon?
All of our religions "secrets" are not secrets. They are merely sacred to us. We do not hold them from anyone, because everyone is welcome to hear what we believe. We believe in the Bible. We believe is Jesus Christ and his restored gospel. We believe in a lot of traditional values that most Christians share.
I'm married and have attended the temple.
It's not weird.
Like any religion, we hold our temples and the teachings within them sacred, but they are not secretive. We don't sacrifice goats, or have to stand naked in front of anyone, or eat our first born children (yea, I've actually heard that one.) In fact, I can't speak for everyone, but I think I'm pretty normal ;) haha
The reason I bring all this up is simply because this weekend is our faith's semi-annual world wide conference. As a religion, we are addressed by our prominent religious leaders and counseled, taught, and uplifted. We are also given any new/recent revelations. Is anyone curious what all the hype is this year? This morning it was announced that rather than young men having to wait until their 19 years old to serve missions, and girls at 21 years old, they've changed it so that guys can go out at 18 and girls at 19.
This. Is. Huge.
Here is my favorite face in the audience:
hahaha.
Can I just say how jealous I am P.S? If I were 2 years younger and not married....
Anywho I want to make a formal invitation that if anyone wants to really know what we believe, you do not have to be a member to watch the conference or listen. It's open to all. So if your curiosity is strong enough, feel free to do so HERE.
I appreciate all of my followers, and I appreciate you humoring me with this post. If I lost a few followers for breaking the Blogger taboo and bringing up religion, or because you realized wait, she's Mormon? then so be it. I in no way mean to preach or rant, I just think that as a people no matter what we all believe, we should try harder to tolerate one another as friends, rather than being divided by faith or discrimination.
I hope you guys are having an AWESOME weekend! Big news to come soon!
Those days where you just feel like more than enough is being demanded of you?
It's not like it's been a particularly hard day or that my husband has been anything less than wonderful, it's just been long, tiring, and overly demanding.
And so help me...
If one more dish demands to be washed,
one more towel demands to be folded,
one more pillow demands to be fluffed,
one more homework assignment demands to be done,
one more self conscious thought demands me to work out,
one more tear threatens to fall from my eyelashes for no.blasted.good.reason,
then I will have no choice but to go out to the garden, dig up a small and innocent worm and torture it with every evil bone in my body. (Too much?)
My adult senses that draw back the childhood memories of being taught right and wrong demand me to stop acting like a whiny and immature two-year-old and suck it up.
But I. don't. want. to.
(you should have read that in a whiny two-year-old voice, otherwise we can't be friends)
What I want is to have a bowl of popcorn all to myself, curl up in bed in my panties, watch Coraline, or The Fantastic Mr. Fox, or some other movie far below my level of mental stimulation, and to wake up to a perfectly clean house, and all my homework done.
Is that really too much to ask?!
NO.
And when I wake up and this is not the case,
THIS will be the face I make as my eyes most likely prey on the pair of plaid pajama pants on the ground (or my unsuspecting husband breathing my air) :
Which will then be followed by this face:
Then my husband will most likely have the pleasure of being woken up by a display similar to this:
( and yes, if needed I may just even pound on my chest like Donkey Kong. I'll try to resist shoving a remote control up my rump.)
Only to be followed by none other than this reaction:
DO YOU FEEL ME?!
Heaven forbid, if I have to close one more cabinet door, my brain may very
well explode into a Jackson Pollock across the inside of my cranium.
Someone tell me I'm not the only one who has these days!
With that being said, I will be in my room, with some popcorn, ignoring anything and everything that is driving my OCD self to insanity.
