Saturday, January 7, 2012

The Perfect Man.

Have you ever been searching the internet, or (if you are like me) passing the time on Pinterest, and you come across something that is pretty silly, kinda clever, makes you chuckle a little and think "ha. I should make that, regardless of the fact it is purely ridiculous..."? 

I know I have. Like, everyday of my life. And apparently so has my mother. Because of this, I received this for Christmas.

Yes Ladies and Gentleman, I know I ask for it every year, but unlike the puppy I also asked for every year... This year I got one. 
A man.
Do you see it? 
Maybe this will help.
So this is love.

Ridiculous? Yes. 
Pathetic? Possibly. 
Awesome? Absolutely.

He only has one arm... but it's what's on the inside that counts right? 
On the inside, he is fluffy, cuddly goodness. :)

I don't know if I've just taken every break-up a little too poorly, or if my mother has finally realized that yes, I will never be married and is trying to fill a void in my life, but whatever the reason is, I really don't care. This guy is here to stay.

So here's the reasons I've decided EVERY girl needs one of these:
-He ain't a gold-digger, meaning, this dude is cheap. One mens shirt+pillows= love.
-He is honor-code approved (if you are a BYU student, you know what I mean). This guy, is the only guy getting into us ladies bedrooms :)
-He will never have bad breath.
-Seriously, how great of a gift would this be to a girlfriend of yours, single or not!
-He doesn't get handsy. (after all... you need hands in order to run into that issue...)
-No. Commitment. He won't text you while you are on dates, ask you where you are every 5 minutes or forget your anniversary, because frankly, you two won't have an anniversary to forget.
-He is seriously SO comfortable. It's one easy chest to lay on.
-Toss those teddy bears and baby blankets, because once you have this guy, he's hard to sleep without!
-Look at it. Isn't it hilarious? COME ON! WHO WOULDN'T WANT ONE!?
-Most importantly, he will always be there. Always. You won't have to wonder if your are wasting his time, or if there's somewhere else he'd rather be. You won't have to feel self-conscious about not wearing make-up around him. He won't be frustrated that you just want him to hold you while you cry, or that you cannot express what may be upsetting you. He won't pry, but likewise he won't turn on a football game and act like he doesn't care. 

What more convincing do you need? 
Go steal dad's shirt.
Make a man pillow.
Kiss those sleepless and lonely night au revior!

You can thank me later :)
Now if you'll excuse me, I have a man pillow calling my name.


Oh hey! You're awesome.